(First meal)Since my daughter was born in May 2008 I have been very lucky to have a ton of great support. Support comes in all shapes and sizes, and from all different walks of life. My family, being from England and Scotland, are used to homebirths and were wonderfully supportive (my dad is a worry-wart, but he warmed up the idea quickly), and my Grandmother instilled in me how birthing (and placentas) are completely natural and not "gross". I would have to say though, that one of my biggest, and most unexpected support, has come from my husband's Grandparents on his father's side.
They are typical Grandparents, with great stories to tell, and even if you have heard it before, you just want to make sure you don't miss a single word. Grandpa has been struck by lightning twice in his life (seems to run in the family, his father was struck aswell), and Grandma raised 7 children with only 12 cloth diapers, a borrowed crib and without an electric washing machine for years. Not to mention she had to walk 6 blocks to the hospital to give birth to one of her babies, but 20 minutes later she had a baby in her arms.
After my daughter was born, we went over to their house for the first visit with her Great-Grandparents, she was almost a week old. I remember sitting in Grandpa's lazyboy chair trying to nurse my little baby. We had a very hard time breastfeeding at first, she wouldn't latch properly and my nipples were awfully sore and bruised. I really needed to make sure I could see what I was doing, so there were no blankets to cover her or me, but no one seemed to care. His Grandma just kept talking to me about her experieces as a mother while I tried to feed my little one. After a little while, once I had her latched, my husband's Grandpa came over and said to me " I know this may sound wierd. But how is she nursing? Has your milk come it?" and then he proceded to tell me "this is the best thing for her, it is so good for her". It was so comforting to hear that. Having someone being so supportive of something I really wanted to do, but was really struggling with. And to know that his Grandma had gone through the same pain as me but assured me it would get better.
I love going over to their house, because I feel comfortable feeding my daughter there and I don't have to worry about negative remarks or looks or being avoided. They always sit with me when I nurse, and look me in the eyes, or watch my daughter nurse.They also always seem to have a story to tell me about a woman they saw on TV who was treated poorly for feeding her baby in public and think people should just look the other way if they don't like what they see. Today, Grandpa said "If they don't like it, why are they looking? This is how babies are fed". I feel safe and comfortable nursing my baby there.
As my daughter gets older and I am continuing to nurse her, it is getting harder to find good support. I have started going to Le Leche League meetings to find some extra support. Many people feel she is "too old" to be nursing at 19 months but I was happy to find out today, while visiting, that my husband's Grandparents are still very supportive of my choice to continue breastfeeding.
Support comes in all shapes, sizes and ages. The most supportive in my life have been my Grandmother, and my husband's Grandparents. They understand that babies need milk to survive thrive and in their time the only milk for baby came from the mother. I want to thank them for all the support they have given me and continue to give, it has really made a huge difference in my life. Thank you all so much.
Much Love
Marissa
They are typical Grandparents, with great stories to tell, and even if you have heard it before, you just want to make sure you don't miss a single word. Grandpa has been struck by lightning twice in his life (seems to run in the family, his father was struck aswell), and Grandma raised 7 children with only 12 cloth diapers, a borrowed crib and without an electric washing machine for years. Not to mention she had to walk 6 blocks to the hospital to give birth to one of her babies, but 20 minutes later she had a baby in her arms.
After my daughter was born, we went over to their house for the first visit with her Great-Grandparents, she was almost a week old. I remember sitting in Grandpa's lazyboy chair trying to nurse my little baby. We had a very hard time breastfeeding at first, she wouldn't latch properly and my nipples were awfully sore and bruised. I really needed to make sure I could see what I was doing, so there were no blankets to cover her or me, but no one seemed to care. His Grandma just kept talking to me about her experieces as a mother while I tried to feed my little one. After a little while, once I had her latched, my husband's Grandpa came over and said to me " I know this may sound wierd. But how is she nursing? Has your milk come it?" and then he proceded to tell me "this is the best thing for her, it is so good for her". It was so comforting to hear that. Having someone being so supportive of something I really wanted to do, but was really struggling with. And to know that his Grandma had gone through the same pain as me but assured me it would get better.
I love going over to their house, because I feel comfortable feeding my daughter there and I don't have to worry about negative remarks or looks or being avoided. They always sit with me when I nurse, and look me in the eyes, or watch my daughter nurse.They also always seem to have a story to tell me about a woman they saw on TV who was treated poorly for feeding her baby in public and think people should just look the other way if they don't like what they see. Today, Grandpa said "If they don't like it, why are they looking? This is how babies are fed". I feel safe and comfortable nursing my baby there.
As my daughter gets older and I am continuing to nurse her, it is getting harder to find good support. I have started going to Le Leche League meetings to find some extra support. Many people feel she is "too old" to be nursing at 19 months but I was happy to find out today, while visiting, that my husband's Grandparents are still very supportive of my choice to continue breastfeeding.
Support comes in all shapes, sizes and ages. The most supportive in my life have been my Grandmother, and my husband's Grandparents. They understand that babies need milk to survive thrive and in their time the only milk for baby came from the mother. I want to thank them for all the support they have given me and continue to give, it has really made a huge difference in my life. Thank you all so much.
Much Love
Marissa
That's so amazing! <3
ReplyDeleteI wish I had that kind of support, your truely lucky. I mean even my current friends (you and Krysten aside) would give me weird looks or think its nasty. My family wouldn't agree with it much past a year. Its going to be a struggle to feel comfortable to continue nursing my next baby well past a year; Even NOW when I try to prepare everyone by talking about what I am going to do differently next time around they say its "inappropriate" and "not necessary". My mother said that if they aren't using it for food its not necessary to continue and it becomes more of a habit for the mother then the child.
ReplyDeleteI think what people often forget is that its not FOOD but its DRINK. I give Cameron cows milk, yes, but I would prefer to be giving him human milk that are full of antibodies.
Why does breastmilk have to always be thought of something to eat instead of something to drink? Because most people feel that after a year its no longer the main source of food and that is how breastmilk is commonly thought of hence: breastFEEDING. It annoys me.
I really and truely hope I will have you and Krysten and perhaps even others to help me through my walk with my next baby because I would love nothing mroe then to be still nursing and I don't consider it "gross".
Beautiful article.
Tara, don't worry about what other people say. Because once you enter the world of extended breastfeeding you find that it is more common than you think. Almost all the moms I know nurse their babies past 1 year, and several I know nurse past 3years. I still don't know how long I will with Abi, I am think if we get pregnant after she is 2, then when the supply decreases in pregnancy she may just wean herself, but if not I would be happy to tandem nurse.
ReplyDeleteThere are also great articles on the nutritional benefits of breastfeeding a child past the age of 12 mos and even past the age of 3 years. I can get you that info, or I can write an post about it. But because I am still breastfeeding Abigael, she doens't need a multi-vitamin, she gets the majority of her vitamins and minerals from the breast milk. Then her diet of solid foods make up the rest.
It is also good to just educate those around you and if they have a problem with it, either don't talk about and if they bring it up leave the conversation. Or just flat out tell them "This is what is best for my family and many other families and it is not open for discussion". I have done that with my Mother for certain things.
We know the natural weaning age of children is between 2 1/2 years and 7 years. So let's keep giving them what nature intended for us to give. The gift of life and health from our own bodies.
Much love